Monday, December 19, 2011
Blah. I hate the word itself now. Just felt like griping this morning. I don't think I have ever described what my days including mornings are like. This illness is really destroying the joy I used to get from mornings. Some people are morning people and some aren't. I never really claimed to be a morning person but I did used to enjoy getting up early to start my day so that I would be done with my work earlier in the day. The hemicrania continua has turned mornings into something awful. I can't just get up and cheerfully start my day anymore. I set an alarm the night before but when it goes off immediately my head is killing me. I get up and bring my ice pack back to bed with me, setting and resetting my alarm several times until I finally realize the pain is not going away so I might as well get out of bed. I make myself some coffee, check my email and then usually get to work. I work a couple hours until the girls wake up then stop. Next is breakfast and then school work. After school work, lunch and chores are done I am back to work late in the afternoon. Next a break for cooking and eating dinner then back to work again. Some nights I work until 11:30 or midnight. People are amazed when I tell them what I do every day with my condition. They say they don't see how I do it. I really don't know how, I just keep going. But that has been my life for quite a while now since I have had this. I just keep going through life, not necessarily enjoying any of it, but what is the phrase I am looking for? Ah, yes. I just keep on keeping on.